Everyone has heard the expression, “you have one chance to make a first impression.” After meeting thousands of people over the last 15 years, I can safely say wearing sunglasses is not the way to do it.
When speaking to someone the first time, eye contact is very important. First, if you never look at the person, you give the wrong impression to the other person. This can cause them to think you don’t want to speak to them, you’re overly shy and not confident or you’re hiding something. This obviously is not the impression we should want to give to someone else when trying to make a positive first impression. Second, if you make eye contact with someone else too long this can be unnerving. You can make people feel uncomfortable and they will probably wonder what’s a matter with you.
A good 2 or 3 seconds should be all you need to make solid eye contact. After 2 or 3 seconds, you should look elsewhere then start over. It is natural for most people, but if it isn’t for you, you will need to be proactive. Sunglasses prevent any meaningful exchange to take place. You are unable to correctly judge the progress of the two-way communication. If you are playing poker it’s great. However, for developing contacts or friends it is not recommended.
Creating a friendship is a little give and take from one another. It’s letting the other person see inside of you and discover they like what they see.
Dump the sunglasses. Put on a smile and make friends. Then put the sunglasses back on and be cool.
Timothy Shannon is the author of the Self Improvement Thoughts.
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